So here's the situation you come home from a tough day at the beach,(or work but I prefer the beach) being the lazy drunkard that you are you find your fridge empty of beer. The weather is freakin hot and your not sure if you can make it all the way to the store to replenish your stock. A last you remember that you have two cans of Milwaukee's Best rolling around in the trunk of your since the last ball game you tailgated at. The problem is they are currently about 150 degrees almost too hot to pick up. You could put them in the fridge or freezer but you don't have time that. You need your libations NOW. If only their was some magical Wizard that could turn your beer almost instantly ice cold?
But wait there is
The Chill Wizard
It's no coincidence that the Chill Wizard stinkingly resembles Mr Einstein.
Not only did Albert figure out how to put bubbles in beer using his theroy of relativity (as we learned in the critically acclaimed movie "Young Einstein") His theories were fundamental in the advancement of beer chilling technology
I believe as soon as the Manhattan Project project was finished scientists began hard at work on this marvel of modern technology. If only they had started work on it before the atom bomb, the joy of cold beer for all may have ended the war peacefully. I could be wrong (Highly Unlikely) but I believe it was this invention created in 1957 (Perhaps) that spawned the United States Government to create an off shout for it's best Scientists (the designers of Chill Wizard) to get us on the moon and thus NASA was born.
Such a beautifully simple invention. It consists of a small motor powered by 2 AA batteries shelled in a plastic case. At the end of the motor is a small suction cup that sticks to the bottom of your beer. The motor slides in place on a plastic box w/lid. Place a few ice cubes below your beer and few on top and your ready to flip the switch and start spinning. Because the the beer inside the can is spinning in a circle pressure does not build up. After about 1 minute (maybe 90 seconds) your beer goes from room temperature to Ice cold.(colder than in the fridge)
I bought the chill Wizard about 15 years ago (I'm 31 now) I must of been using on Soda's back then that I didn't want mom to see in the fridge (yep that's my story and I'm sticking to it) It also came in handy about 3 years ago when I had this roommate who would drink all the beer from the fridge in the middle of night.
The Chill Wizard is a great way to protect yourself from beer thievery.
The Chill Wizard is a great way to protect yourself from beer thievery.
My chill Wizard is still going strong after all these years. Judging by the box it came in (which I still have for some reason) it was packaged in 1992. I think I paid about $15 dollars for this priceless gift of cold beer. It's a hard item to find on the internet but can easily be replicated at home for a couple bucks. If you got the cash you could try the Cooper Cooler which also does wine bottles. I have not tried it myself but have heard it works well. Perhaps I'll ask Santa for it next time I see him at the mall.
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